


Winner Takes All

by KillerQueen80



Category: Glee
Genre: Baby Shower, F/M, Gen, M/M, Party Games, compeititve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-19
Updated: 2014-02-19
Packaged: 2018-01-13 01:21:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1207549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KillerQueen80/pseuds/KillerQueen80
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt and Blaine get competitive playing party games at Mercedes' baby shower.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Winner Takes All

"I'm so excited! They're the first ones out of us to have a kid. I feel so grown up now," Kurt says, bouncing in his spot on the passenger side of their rental.

Blaine laughs as he turns the car onto a residential street.

"This is what makes you feel grown up? Not the fact that we've been married seven years, or that we have a mortgage, or the fact that we're closer to 30 than 21? None of that makes you feel grown up? Just Sam and Mercedes having a baby."

"Blaine, we're going to be Godparents. Our best friends are going to birth a little clone. This is huge."

"Well, technically, I'm going to be a godfather -"

"Yes, because our best friends know that I won't stand up in church and you will. But we're married, what's your is mine and that includes your god son."

"I'm just teasing, sweetie. He'll be lucky to have you as his Godfather," Blaine says, taking Kurt’s hand in the one he doesn’t have on the steering wheel.

"We need a new name for that. Something less mafia and more ‘person that guides him through life fashionably’."

"I don't know, Sam's really excited about the whole Godfather aspect. You know how long he worked on his Don Corleon impression."

"I know. Thank God Mercedes talked him out of sending people teddy bear heads as announcements."

Blaine stops in front of a big two story house with a nicely manicured lawn. The driveway is full of cars and people can be seen through the gates running around, music can be heard coming from the backyard. He turns off the car.

"Bummed that they didn't have the shower in New York?" Blaine asks as he takes off his seatbelt.

"I was, because we could have had it at a nice little tea shop or something, but it makes more sense to have it at her parent’s house. They have that huge yard and you know Sam and Mercedes’ Dad are gonna want to use the barbeque," Kurt checks himself in the mirror before getting out.

Blaine looks down at his pants with a sigh.

"I didn't even think of that, I should have worn loser pants. You know how much I love Sam's barbeque."

"I know, Sweetie. Mercedes won't be the only one who can't see her toes by the end of the night," Kurt teases, patting a pouting Blaine on the belly before opening the trunk. Blaine follows, opens one of the car doors and crawls into the backseat before crawling back out.

"We're gonna need help. Why do you bring two cakes?"

"One that Mercedes won't have to share, you know how much she loves German Chocolate cake."

Blaine nods and turns around just in time to be tackled by a blur of long dark hair.

"Boo! I missed you!" Tina squeals hugging Blaine.

"I missed you too, Tay Tay! How are you?" Blaine kisses the top of her head before letting her go.

"I spent four hours making pacifier necklaces because Mercedes decided clothespins were too ugly. I only got the feeling back in my fingertips a few minutes ago."

"Hey wait a second, I was under the impression that pregnant Moms are allowed to be divas at their own showers," Kurt says as he tries to wrestle a huge box out of the trunk.

"Please, you act like Mercedes has only been a diva today," Tina says rolling her eyes playfully.

"I see being a newlywed has not made you lose your bite. I'm so proud. Now come give me a hug and help me with this," Kurt says opening his arms for her.

When they get inside, Tina carrying one cake while Blaine carries the other in one hand and helps Kurt with their gift with the other, they find a very pregnant Mercedes in the middle of the living room arguing with her Mother while Sam stands between them looking nervous.

"Kurt! Blaine! You made it. Gifts go by the TV and the food can go into the kitchen!" Sam announces before mouthing "Help Me" to Blaine.

"Aren't you supposed to be sitting on a throne with people worshipping you and feeding you peeled grapes or something?" Kurt asks before putting the gift down and running to Mercedes.

"That's what I've been telling her, but you know she's hard headed," Mercedes' Mom Pam tells him before kissing he and then Blaine on the cheek.

"And this one is too scared of her to agree with me," she says, pointing at Sam who’s hovering around nervously.

"You say scared, I say smart," Mercedes says rolling her eyes.

"Look at you, you're glowing, and that dress! Who knew Maternity clothes came that fabulous?" Kurt says kissing Mercedes on the forehead and rubbing her belly.

"Boy, you know I would have found a way.. Sadly, my feet were too swollen to get into the shoes I bought to go with it. And can you believe my Dad tried to get me to wear Crocs to my baby shower?"

Kurt gasp, "He didn't! Where is your Dad so we can have another talk about his footwear choices?"

"He's been hiding outside at the grill with the guys," Mercedes kisses Kurt on the cheek before he heads out and turns to Blaine.

"Hey sweetheart. I'm so glad you're here. Can you please take Sam outside, I think he's freaking out a little."

"Of course. You look gorgeous," Blaine presses a quick kiss to her forehead before gesturing to Sam and heading towards the backdoor.

He ends up outside where Kurt, Puck, Sam and Mike are standing at the Grill talking as Mercedes’ Dad Martin hands Sam the fork and heads inside, patting Blaine on the shoulder on his way in. 

Mike sees Blaine first and pulls him in for a hug and Puck punches him playfully on the shoulder.

"Oh, those are the necklaces Tina made. Why are you wearing them?" Blaine asks curiously.

"Oh, some game. If you get one, you can't cross any of your limbs and if you catch other people crossing, you get theirs. The person who has the most at the end of the day wins a prize," Mike explains.

"There's games? No one told me there were games!" Kurt says excitedly clapping.

"Oh no. Don't you two start," Puck warns.

"Start what?" Blaine asks, offended.

"You know how you two get when you start competing. Remember that time at Stacey's birthday party back in the day? You two won prizes from ten year olds. And then the gloating and arguing-," Sam says, reaching over to poke at the charcoals with a fork.

"We do not gloat!" Kurt says at the same time that Blaine says, "Kurt gloats."

"Hey. Don't be mad because you can't handle me winning. And Sam, your pacifier, please." Kurt says smugly.

"Why?" Sam asks looking affronted.

"When you reached over to grab that fork, you crossed your left arm over your right."

"You aren't in the game. You don't even have one yet!" Sam protests.

"Well, now I have yours," Kurt puts his hand out and Sam pouts as he takes the necklace from around his neck.

"Game on," Kurt says to Blaine before turning to head towards the picnic table being occupied by Rachel, Quinn, Unique and Sam’s sister Stacey. 

The guys exchange a look. 

“Oh no,” Puck says with a scared look on his face. Sam starts shaking his head frantically at Blaine.

“Oh it’s on,” Blaine says before walking over to where Tina and Ryder are talking to Sam’s parent’s. Ryder’s got his arm around Tina who’s standing with her feet crossed. The guys watch as Blaine taps her on the shoulder, smiles politely and points down to her feet. She rolls her eyes at him and hands him her pacifier while Ryder looks on confused. 

“It’s only going to get worse from here,” Puck warns. 

The Safety Pin Game

“Alright everyone, if you want to play games, come inside. Otherwise, feel free to stay out here with the music!” Pam announces. Kurt and Blaine are sitting at a table eating with Rachel, Tina and Ryder talking. Kurt grabs his plate and gets up quickly, heading into the house in the middle of Ryder’s sentence. Blaine grabs his beer and follows after Kurt. Ryder looks to Tina confused and she just shakes her head while Rachel gets up and follows them inside. After a second, Tina sighs deeply and follows them, pulling Ryder along with her. 

When they get inside the house, Santana is standing with two bowls in her hand. One bowl is filled with rice and the other bowl is empty.

“The rules to this game are simple, if you have two brain cells to rub together. Quinn’s going to blindfold you, and you have thirty second to find as many teeny tiny safety pins in the rice using only your fingers. The person who manages to find the most win. Also, you can only use one hand, other one stays behind your back. Got it? If i catch you cheating, no food for you. Sam made his magic barbecue chicken and Mercedes’ Dad made his perfect macaroni salad and I wants all of it. So please, I beg you, cheat in front of me.” 

Quinn cuts Santana off, “We’re all family here, no one’s going to cheat. Now, who wants to go first?”

Sam’s sister Stacey raises her hand and walks over to Quinn and Santana. She pulls her long blonde hair into a ponytail and Quinn ties the blindfold on.

“Alright Trouty Jr, can you see?” 

“Not a thing. Let’s do this.” 

“Alright, Quinn, start the clock.” 

Quinn starts a timer on her phone, “Okay, go!” 

Kurt and Blaine watch as Stacey grab handful after handful of rice, but fails to find many safety pins, letting the rice sift between her fingers and the safety pins going with it.

“I see you strategizing over there, Blaine. Don’t think you’re going to beat me. Those nerve endings in your fingers are dead from years of playing instruments, you won’t be able to tell the difference,” Kurt mutters to Blaine, not taking his eyes off of the game.

“I’ve always had an easier time focusing on my other senses with a blindfold on, so I think I’m actually at an advantage, and considering the number of needle pricks to your fingertips, I wouldn’t be talking about people’s nerve endings,” Blaine mutters back just as Quinn calls time on Stacey. Kurt glares at Blaine as Quinn and Santana count Stacey’s safety pins.

“Okay, Stacey’s got three. Three is the number to beat, who’s next?” Kurt’s hand shoots up and he pushes himself through the crowd. 

“I’m next. Watch and learn, people,” Kurt says smugly, cracking his knuckles as Quinn ties the blindfold and then starts the timer. 

“Why are you guys getting so intense about this? I saw some of the prizes, they’re lame,” Ryder whispers to Blaine who’s watching Kurt intently.

“I have a point to prove. You’re a newlywed, Ryder, you wouldn’t understand,” Blaine says, brushing him off and turning back to watch Kurt as Quinn calls time. Tina walks up and wraps her arms around Ryder. 

“Don’t listen to him, please. He and Kurt have been like this for ages. You never went to game nights at the Hummel’s. It got to the point where Rachel, Rachel of all people, thought they were too competitive and refused to play Monopoly with them. We will never be like them, Ryder. No way.”

“Kurt’s got eight! Come on Blaine, we all know you want next,” Santana says, rolling her eyes with Kurt standing behind her.

“You’re not going to beat me. I got this one.” 

Quinn offers Blaine the chance to go right after Kurt, but he shakes his head and stands back. He watches as Tina, Ryder, Unique, one of Mercedes’ cousins and finally Rachel goes, before Blaine steps forward to take his turn. 

Quinn and Santana exchange a look as Blaine rolls his shoulders before putting his hand out and feeling around for the bowl.

“Whoa, calm down Eyebrows, Quinn hasn’t even set the timer yet, Jesus.” 

“Okay, Blaine, go!” 

Blaine sticks only his fingertips in the bowl, sifting small amounts of rice and catching the safety pins relatively quickly, dropping multiples in the bowl at one time. Kurt starts to cross his arms defensively before catching himself and looking around to make sure no one noticed. 

“Okay, Time!” 

Quinn takes off Blaine’s blindfold and he smiles sweetly at Kurt. He starts to wrap an arm around his husband and Kurt starts to lean into it. 

“Blaine’s got 13! He wins,” Santana announces to groans from everyone else. Quinn hands Blaine his gift bag and he peaks inside with a smile. With a laugh, Blaine opens up the bag for Kurt to look inside. Kurt shakes him off with a scowl and goes to sit next to Mercedes who is shaking her head and laughing. 

My Water Broke

Sam, Stevie and Puck pass out ice cubes and bowls while Tina hands out towels to everyone sitting on the floor. 

“The next game is called my water broke. In the middle of your ice cube is a plastic teddy bear. The goal of the game is to melt the ice and free your bear. You can’t put it in your mouth, you can’t crack it, and you can’t pour anything on it. The first person to yell “My water broke!” wins,” Pam explains. 

“You’re going down, Anderson,” Kurt whispers.

“I bet he is,” Puck says, handing Kurt a towel. 

“Okay, go!” 

Kurt picks up the ice cube and puts it in his palm rubbing his hands together quickly.

“You know how you’re always saying my hands can handle any temperature with no problem? That’s gonna come in handy now, Kurt brags. 

Blaine picks up his ice cube, putting it in his palms, bringing them up to his mouth and blowing on it. Next to him, Rachel keeps dropping her ice cube to rub her hands with her towel. Santana eats a spoonful of salsa before picking up her ice cube and breathing into her hand. Blaine drops his ice and tries to warm up his hands. Kurt drops his ice cube and raises his hand in the air.

“MY WATER BROKE!” Kurt yells, holding up his plastic teddy bear.

Everyone else drops theirs, Blaine groans before sitting on his hands to warm them up. Then he looks across from him to where Stacey and Rachel have both crossed their legs. He sticks his hands out for their pacifiers. 

“If I weren’t so sure that the prizes were likely picked by Sam and therefore are nothing I could possibly use, I’d be giving you two a run for your money, you know,” Rachel says. 

“Jeez, is this high school all over again? Calm down, I’m sure it’s just some crappy candles Trouty found for like 99 cents at Big Lots. Seriously. Ugh, I’m going to get more macaroni salad.” Santana gets up and heads towards the kitchen. Mercedes’ Mom comes over and hands Kurt his gift bag. 

 

Pee Pee in the Potty

They end up taking a brief break so everyone can eat again, before setting up the next game. Just as Santana sits down with her third plate of chicken, Pam gets everyone’s attention. 

“The next game is called Pee Pee in the Potty. When you’re pregnant, especially when you’re this far along, you find that you always have to go to the bathroom, but you can’t quite see what you’re doing, and you may miss the target it you know what I mean.” Everyone laughs and Mercedes hides her face in embarrassment while Sam kisses the back of her hand. 

Pam starts speaking again and Tina sets a shot glass in the middle of the floor. 

“So the way you play is this, you’ll put a balloon under your shirt to represent the belly,” Pam explains and Tina demonstrates by sticking a balloon under her top. “Then, you’ll put a lime between your knees and you have to walk to the shot glass and drop the lime in. If the lime falls out before you make it, you’re out.” 

Tina sticks a lime between her knees and shuffles over to the shot glass. Once she’s sure that she’s directly over it, she drops the lime right into the glass. 

“Oh, I got this, sorry boys. Looks like those perfectly tailored clothes mean you have to sit this one out,” Santana says, handing Blaine her plate. 

Blaine looks down at his and Kurt’s perfectly tailored and extremely tight shirts.

“I think she may be right Kurt, we may have to sit this out.” Blaine says with a sigh, watching as Rachel hides behind Tina and Quinn to put the balloon up her dress. He turns and shares a look at Kurt before Kurt pops up from his spot and runs over to where Mercedes’ parents are sitting and watching the action. He sees Kurt bend down to whisper to them before getting up and making his way towards Sam who’s sitting with Mercedes’ feet in his lap, giving her a massage.

“Hey, Sam, you guys are staying here, right? Does that mean you have clothes and stuff here, like a hoodie or something?” 

Sam stops what he’s doing, looking up at Blaine, confused. Mercedes smacks his hand and he continues rubbing her feet. 

“Kurt just asked me for a hoodie too, it’s like 90 degrees in here, why are you guys cold?” 

“Because they want to play the game, but they can’t get a balloon underneath their tight ass shirts,” Mercedes says before closing her eyes and groaning as Sam applies pressure to the ball of her foot. 

“Up in my old bedroom, Blaine. He should have a hoodie hanging in the closet.” 

“Thank you, Mercedes,” Blaine says, leaning over to kiss her forehead before heading towards the stairs. 

“They’re ridiculous, but so entertaining,” Mercedes tells Sam.

“You know it’s only going to get worse as Luke gets older and has more parties.” 

“Oh, I know. I can’t wait for them to have one of their own so we can put them through this. I don’t know about you, but I’m a raising absolute hell at their first overly fancy baby shower.” 

*******  
Upstairs, Blaine pulls on Sam’s hoodie and zips it, pulling it out in front of him to see if there’d be room for the balloon. He leaves Mercedes’ room, closing the door behind him to come face to face with Kurt in a black pullover hoodie, exiting the room across from his. 

“I see we had the same idea,” Kurt says, before smiling wickedly at Blaine and running towards the stairs. Blaine runs after him with a laugh. 

“Seriously, you two!” Tina says with a laugh as they chase each other through the house, “You guys didn’t even have this much energy when you were 17.” 

“No, Kurt mostly sat around judging everyone before rolling his eyes and beating us at all the games,” Mercedes adds. 

“Knowing them, this is some kind of freaky foreplay that they making us all accomplices in. Which, gross,” Puck says, taking a swig of his beer. Kurt and Blaine just exchange a smile as Kurt takes the balloon from Quinn. 

“Good luck with this game boys, this one’s tough. So far, Santana’s the only one who’s been able to get the lime in the shot glass.” 

“I’ve got some powerful thighs and excellent aim, what can I say?” 

Kurt puts the balloon underneath the hoodie and stands at the finish line. Quinn hands him the lime. Kurt puts the lime between his knees and starts slowly towards the shots glass, but after a few steps, he loses his balance for a second, trips and drops the lime. 

“Damn it!” Kurt says, taking the balloon out and glaring at it. 

“This game is hard, I refuse to believe this is a real game,” Rachel says from where she’s sitting with a plate of salad. 

“Is this really what it’s like when you’re pregnant and have to pee?” Stacey asks.

Pam, Quinn, and Mercedes all answer “Yes” at once. 

“Ew. I’m never having kids,” is Stacey’s reply. 

“Good,” Sam tells her, and she rolls her eyes at him. 

“Alright, Blaine, your turn. Let’s see if you can make it further than your poorly coordinated husband.” 

Blaine sticks the balloon under the sweatshirt, and takes the lime between his knees. He inches slowly, step by step until he’s over the shot glass, stops, bends at the knees a little more. Everyone gets a little quiet as Blaine releases the lime. Which lands in the shotglass. And then falls over. 

When the glass falls over, Santana cheers and Kurt breathes a sigh of relief. Santana collects her prize when no one else volunteers to play. 

The Cotton Ball Game

“Okay, I want some damn cake, can we play the last game?” Mercedes says from her seat with a laugh. 

“You guys heard the woman. One last game. I’m sure i don’t have to explain this one, because everyone has played this at least once,” Quinn says pouring a bag of cotton balls onto the floor. 

“To make it go a bit faster, we’re playing head to head. Who wants to go first?” 

Everyone “oohs” as Kurt and Blaine stand up and take their place on the floor. 

“Ooh husband to husband, huh?” Martin says, coming in from the grill, “One of you gonna wind up sleeping on the couch after this?” 

“Only if Blaine’s a sore loser. I was awesome at this game as a kid.” Kurt says, smugly. 

“Not as good as I was,” Blaine retorts. Tina rolls her eyes and takes a blindfold from Quinn and ties it around Kurt’s eyes as Quinn ties Blaine’s. They each put a spoon and a bowl in their hands, and Kurt and Blaine flail around for a second feeling the ground in front of them. 

“Okay, you get 30 seconds… and go!” 

They both flail for second mostly spooning at thin air. Everyone laughs when every time Blaine gets some cotton on his spoon, he moves too quickly, causing it to blow off. Kurt, is still looking smug as he mostly spoons air into his bowl. They count down the end of their time and when it’s up, they both pull off their blindfolds. They look shocked when they look into their bowls to find them mostly empty. 

Quinn picks up Kurt’s bowl and counts the cotton balls.

“So, Kurt’s got 6…” she puts down his bowl and picks up Blaine’s, “And Blaine’s got 4. So, um, who’s next?” 

Kurt and Blaine get up as Stevie and Stacey take their spots on the floor. 

“Well, that was anti-climatic,” Blaine says, disappointed. 

“Yeah, so, cake?” Kurt asks.

“Of course, after you, sir,” Blaine says, and Kurt takes his hand. 

“Wait, that’s it? You guys were like maniacs, and now you’re just whatever?” Tina asks.

“I won one, Kurt won one, so now we’ll eat some cake and have fun.” 

“Plus, we’re totally going to win the ultimate game tonight.” 

“The pacifier game?” Ryder asks from where he’s sitting with his arms crossed.

“No, but I’ll have yours,” Kurt says with a raise of his eyebrow. Ryder sighs and hands his over.

“Then, what?” Tina asks impatiently.

“We totally got them the best gift.” And with that, Kurt pulls Blaine towards the kitchen.


End file.
